Many of us will feel compelled to have a big lavish traditional wedding affair, a stupendous ‘do’ to conquer all ‘dos’ that came before – perhaps we have Disney to blame for our childhood expectations of what a wedding should be……
But what becomes of those of us who don’t wish to marry with an audience? Who quiver at the thought of being centre of attention?
Here we may find ourselves in a difficult scenario, you may want certain bits and pieces of the traditional fluttered throughout your day but not an all singing all dancing drama. Or certain people to attend but not others.
So how do you not offend those that are left out?? And face the consistent questions of when, where and how? And ultimately “but why??”
Someone will inevitably be distressed despite all best laid plans. Small ideas you have whispered into the ears of close loved ones can easily become hoisted onto huge raised platforms for all the world and his auntie to see. Before you know it your romantic private wedding day will become unrecognisable from the initial early days of “lets elope!!”
Now I don’t pretend to have all the answers to this one but I certainly would offer the following tips:
- Be affirmative and clear to all those involved from the start. No point ummin and arring at the suggestion of a procession of long lost friends children trailing you down the aisle when you really want your little yorkshire terrier to do the honours.
- Keep the faith that those who know and love you well (although possibly be a little disgruntled) will essentially understand.
- Don’t feel obliged to conform with what everyone else thinks “your” day should be. Stay strong.
- You will never please everyone so you may as well at least please yourselves.
- Be open to suggestions, be kind and courteous but stick to your guns.
- Ultimately don’t become overwhelmed with the plans….you are beginning a life long marriage not having a one day event.
We’d love to hear your tips on “keeping it on a downlow” please comment with your ideas and good/bad experiences to help other wed’n’day-ers along the way.
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